Hatsusaku needs an editor who is an expert at character voicing.
I need someone who has a flexible command of the English language that can polish and refine the text to bring out the unique personalities of each character more.
With the proper characters, if you think you are good at changing lines from:
“Did you hear about how all of those people were beaten up?”
to
“Did’ya hear about how all them idiots got fucked up?”
…then you’re qualified, if you do it properly at the right times with the right characters. I will explain to you how each character should sound and their personalities.
Visual Novel Society | ギャルゲーは趣味でなく, 生き様だ! 
cafe can you guys focus more on Aoiro Rinne? I would really like to see that one translated the most…
I don’t mind trying out the editing, can I give it a try on some sample script though?
Here’s a script full of unnatural English to test yourself on.
http://pastebin.com/GSU1se1a
Key things to think about while working on this script:
1. Does it sound like natural English? Or does it sound too literal of a translation?— Do English natives actually say things like this?
2. Do the characters sound the way they should? (Hatsuyuki should talk very abbreviated when he speaks, and Yoru should sound much more polite in contrast).
3. Do you notice any areas where the translator may have forgotten to type a word? Example: “…is it really to leave that kid alone?”—“…is it really okay to leave that kid alone?”
Good Luck, when you are finished with the script e-mail it to cjszk@hotmail.com or make a pastebin copy and just reply to this.
Oh yes couple of things since I neglected to translate the name tags and other stuff.
初雪= Hatsuyuki,
シロクマ= Shirokuma
綾= Aya
Those are the only characters you need to worry about on this script. Any lines where the Japanese has 「 and 」means a character is talking and the line will be replaced with ” and ” when the script is prepared for use.
http://pastebin.com/qXMm6xP0
Story was fun to read, not sure how I did in terms of editing though :p
You have the pastebin set to private, I can’t see it.
I think it’s public now
Okay, I’ll look over it. One thing though: you used a font that can’t display Japanese. All of the original Japanese is in Chinese gibberish, however that happened I don’t know. In any case I recommend using Notepad + with little endian font.
Did you ever figure out text insertion?
Nope, our hacker is very busy with life, he had problems and a fire happened, etc etc. If you could figure it out that’d be great =).
Well, popping back in…I have to say you took my advice a little too seriously :/. Voicing doesn’t mean *every* line has to be packed with over-the-top flavor. And Hatsuyuki’s more crabby and terse than he is a gangster, if that makes sense. Glad you’re looking for somebody to help though.
Maybe I’ll try since I have a little more time now, but unfortunately my time is more limited than I thought.
I didn’t change “every” line~ I did change the way I voiced Hatsuyuki a bit, but I’m not trying to make him sound gangster. I started finding ways to abbreviate his lines more and use a little bit of profanity to exaggerate other lines. That’s about it. This one script probably comes off as the most exaggerated though since he is for the most part fed up with Shirokuma- if you’re looking at the script I gave to test the editor.
If you’re looking at my post with the example, that’s just a huge exaggeration don’t worry about it.
But I’ve already got half the prologue edited?
Sorry I was afk when you gave me an update on IRC. Can you send me the all of the edited scripts? I haven’t gotten anything yet.